Since I am an “old-ish” man in my 70s I’d like to share some pointers on how to be an old man “that doesn’t look and act like an old man”.

• First of all keep you mouth shut. There is nothing that looks more senile, elderly, and doddery than walking around with you mouth huge open.
• Stay clean. There are myths around, and my father may have starting this one, that says as you get older you shouldn’t bathe as often. Please disregard. Shower or bathe every day. Wash your hair every day. Wash off the Ben-Gay every day. Clean close are a must. Wrinkle from clean clothes.
• Practice eating in front of a mirror. As you age there is a tendency to scarf your food. Maybe it’s last meal syndrome or just hunger, but make sure you maintain you eating etiquette and don’t eat like your feeding from a trough.
• No sandals. I know this is probably a deal breaker for those of you in Oregon and Washington, (and Subaru drivers)“, but sandals, Teva-style, leather, no way! They really don’t look good on anyone, but old gnarly feet scream, “Sneakers, please!”

More to follow!

My wife told me she wanted some peace and quiet in the kitchen while she was cooking.

So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm.

Whoever said, “everything happens for a reason”, never had a cow step on their foot.

-Anonymous

Knock, know!

“Who’s there?”

“The love of your life!”
“Dark chocolate who?”